Bette Grande: Society In Shades Of Grey

It was interesting to watch the hype over the movie Fifty Shades of Grey coming out on Valentine’s Day.

Ah, the romance.

I personally did not read the book nor will I be going to the movie, but then I am particular about those things.

It does bring me to think about the way we, as a society, have allowed our value system to be shaded grey.  The lines between right and wrong are slowly fading.  It is as though we have lost the ability to see an absolute truth.

When will we take responsibility for this, when will we as the “adults in the room” start to call it out once again. Truth verses lies, right verses wrong and the consequences that come with the choices we make.

[mks_pullquote align=”right” width=”300″ size=”24″ bg_color=”#000000″ txt_color=”#ffffff”]Sex trafficking and domestic abuse are a priority this legislative session, and they should be.  But, our society is sending  mixed signals isn’t it?  More laws will do little to address these issues when the message of our society is Fifty Shades of Grey.[/mks_pullquote]

I was often accused of ‘forcing my religion’ on others.  I did not, but it was an easy attack by those who are comfortable with the direction of our society.  I am not talking about faith or religion.  Atheists and agnostics have a moral code as well, and professing a religion does not guarantee morality.  But, I do believe that a functioning society needs to have a moral code.

This slow process was brought to us through a lie here and a lie there.  Each lie repeated often enough that it seems to become the truth.  It is time we stop holding back, as to not offend or being seen as judgmental.  Stop being made to feel guilty or told we are the fools for stating there is right and wrong.

Love and a value system – knowing right from wrong – are the tools we can use to teach our children how to be better people, to avoid repeating costly mistakes that will affect them the rest of their lives and the lives of others.

Laws cannot do that, families and their spheres of influence need to do it.  Remember back when we knew our neighbors, had schools that taught the same values that were taught at home and church.  Social clubs, sports, music and arts used to teach values; now it is all about shock and awe.  Will we ever see fair play again, self-discipline, desire to be the best you can be?  Instead in life and politics we just tear the guy next to you down so we look better.

A question for those who disagree with me, for those who will laugh at these old fashioned ideas –how do you see this ending?  If our society continues on this same course is that a world you want for your children?

Ok so what has got me on this role?  It is many things, domestic abuse in Hollywood and professional sports, sensationalism of the Grammy’s, Brian Williams and lying in the media, families being pushed farther out of their children’s lives by government run schools taking control, with the icing on the cake Fifty Shades of Grey released for Valentine’s Day and packaged as “romance” and “normal”.

Here we are as a society so corrupt morally that we think that this has anything to do with love; that the depravity of a man abusing a young girl is something to get excited about and to copy.  That this is the new norm for young ladies (girls).  The movie is actually about a sick, dangerous relationship filled with physical and emotional abuse. Made to appear sensual, glamorous and normal, the cool thing to try. Abuse is not glamorous or cool.  It is never OK, under any circumstances.

Love is about safety, mutual respect, caring for each other, trust.  Weddings, not hand-cuffs, should be the focus of the relationship. Teaching our girls to stand up for themselves, with values and making choices that don’t lead to self-destruction, how to treat boys respectfully and earn their trust.  Boys that value and respect girls, caring for them and earning their trust. There is no room in a relationship that includes violence, consensual or not.

Sex trafficking and domestic abuse are a priority this legislative session, and they should be.  But, our society is sending  mixed signals isn’t it?  More laws will do little to address these issues when the message of our society is Fifty Shades of Grey.

“Our Constitution was made only for a moral and religious people.  It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other.”  — John Adams

Rob Port is the editor of SayAnythingBlog.com, a columnist for the Forum News Service, and host of the Plain Talk Podcast which you can subscribe to by clicking here.

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