Anne Krapu: Why I’m Voting With Dog the Bounty Hunter

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A combination photo shows U.S. Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton (L) and Republican U.S. presidential candidate Donald Trump (R) in Los Angeles, California on May 5, 2016 and in Eugene, Oregon, U.S. on May 6, 2016 respectively. REUTERS/Lucy Nicholson (L) and Jim Urquhart/File Photos

Dog the Bounty Hunter almost made Fox News cry about sixteen months ago when asked who he was supporting for president.

Cable’s favorite mullet-sporting accessory to justice responded:

“I don’t think [Rubio] can beat the dynamic duo … the Clintons,” Chapman, who is a Republican, said, to much chagrin of those around him. “I want someone with experience. We’re at war.”

“I think that women don’t throw sand at each other like men do. I’m a Republican but I have faith in the dynamic duo,” he added.

I don’t like Hillary Clinton. I find her sense of entitlement to be nauseating and there’s a reason that Bernie’s focus on “we” resonated in many places much more strongly than Clinton’s “I” this and “I” that. But this cycle, I am a single issue voter, and that issue is global security. We can’t pretend that building a wall, virtual or made of concrete, is going to protect us from anything. Global and national security cannot be divorced. And I, like Dog, would prefer to have someone in the Oval Office who has a ton of foreign policy experience.

Before the expected retort of “But Benghazi!” I will tell you that as someone who has gone through parts of the process required to work for the State Department, State doesn’t want people who aren’t willing to take dangerous postings and the risk of death they entail. As for Bill, if we look at the balance between the knowledge he could bring into this White House from having been President for two terms versus cheating on Hillary with Monica, I’ll take condoning the latter over more senseless deaths any day. I’m especially keen on having him around based on our current de facto war with the Russians.

Our global situation is extremely precarious right now, and I’m not really sure I want to find out if Millennials have the grit of the Greatest Generation when put to the test. I’m angry at Republicans for creating Donald Trump, who despite having not been elected has been making the world a less safe place every time he opens his mouth about foreign policy by scaring our allies and emboldening our enemies. I’m angry at President Obama for rolling over on Syria.

There are different reasons people who have been partisan hacks in the past start looking at that (I) affiliation more seriously. I got my first paycheck from the Dem-NPL before I could vote. My last act with that relationship will be to change myself from a Strong Dem to an Independent in VoteBuilder this week. The fact that the Dem-NPL would have problems strategizing itself out of a harvested wheat field in-state post 2012 doesn’t help. That’s particularly sad, because there are good folks with reasonable and innovative ideas over there, and our state needs them.

I’m going to vote for Hillary, but like Dog, not to fall in line. I’m voting for Hillary because we simply cannot add more fuel to the global fire. A repeat of George W. Bush’s post 9/11 call for the nation to hit the shopping mall to solve the problem is not going to cut it this time.

Onward, America.